how do like being dejected?
how do you like feeling rejected?
Rejected by someone who you really like.Rejected by someone who'd you think about every hour, every minute,every second.
Rejected by someone you say you live for, someone you'd think when you eat, sleep and someone who often appear in your dreams.Well maybe your nightmares too.Hee

Have you been in love before? Well, it's not just by saying those words. It's more like living those words. Making them come to life. Have you?
Well, i have. I used to love this particular individual before. I still do even to this day. Even when i'm having a relationship with someone. She was the first i cried for. Well, i never shed any after that. i just thought it was useless. It's it makes you feel better but like the people always say ' what's the point of crying for someone who wouldn't cry for'
well she did cry a few times when i wanted to leave her(i never had had thought of leaving her.it was more like a threat) for what she had done .
everytime she did, i gave in. I comforted her. At the end of the day, i had to comfort her. I apologized for the stuffs i never did.
Was it worth it? Well, as a matter of fact, many, i'd say majority would say it's worthless. They'd say i wasted my time when i was with her.
Well for me, it was all worthwhile.
You know, when you see the person you live for, the person you'd die for, everything in the world feels so calm. It slows down. It's as if no one else existed, it was just the two of you.
The greatest feeling in the world.

Well that changed after awhile, she started seeing her ex again. Well of course i got agitated yet i kept quiet and that's when i started bad. Bad as not bad-ass but i was seeing other girls. That's how it all started.
And then she left me. I couldn't do anything.I just started to cry like a wuss. Okay more like a pussy ehh. Yeah like any other idiot who's really broken-hearted, i did that for a few weeks.My morale was so low.

Then it stopped. I tried to get a rebound. I was bad-ass like never before. Everytime i went out with a girl, i'd break her heart. Well that was always my mission. Because of one individual,just one, i became different. I did what she did to me, not to her though instead to the rest.
i didn't know i was so cruel.Selfish.There's this thing about being a man. Their ego is..well..
The greatest male-ego booster is the moment when women fall at their feet,wanting and needing them(men) more than anything else in the world.
Well i achieved that.

Anyways out of all the misery i caused to the rest, at the end of the day i just think about her.I have always done that. and now it goes all back to the same thing,every hour, every minute, every second.

Well at one point of time, i just decided to stop. Really i stopped. i just felt different. i really don't know why. I just thrash away the life i had. Girls, booze, cash,parties,sex.Whatever you name it, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT.

And at the end of the day, is it worth it?i really don't have the answer ehhh.

Well what i want is to get back with the one i live my life for.
I did try. But i guess it was impossible. Well life's like a box of chocolates eh. and things happens for a reason.
i guess you take it slow and take it one thing at a time.